Soundtrack: Transformers The Movie 20th Anniversary Edition (2007: Volcano/BMG reissue of 1986: Scotti Brothers)

I often poke fun
at cheezy 80s soundtracks -

mainline cheddar here.

http://allmusic.com/album/the-transformers-the-movie-1986-animated-r120528

http://allmusic.com/album/transformers-the-movie-20th-anniversary-edition-r1082474

Crowbar - Sever the Wicked Hand (2011: Entertainment One)

Slog thru delta mud,
fatigue kicks in from sludge trudge;

skilled but no quaint stroll.

http://www.crowbarmusic.com/

Faith No More - Introduce Yourself (1987: Slash)

Music's just fine but
Chuck's toneless croons are awful;

sure ain't The Real Thing.

http://www.fnm.com/

http://www.amazon.com/Introduce-Yourself-Faith-No-More/dp/B00004YLAO

Hellacopters - Rock & Roll Is Dead (2005: Wild Kingdon)

Fun, dumb, full of... drum
runs retro/punk yet stays fresh;

title flat misleads.

http://www.hellacopters.com/site/disco.asp?action=rockisdead

Di'Anno - S/T (1984: FM)

Half-ass pomp-rock that
sounds like Frank Stallone castoffs;

for shame Paul, for shame.

http://www.pauldianno.com/dianno.shtml

Demons of Dirt - Killer Engine (2002: Hammerheart)

Swedes dethroll half hour
of Pantera chug and shrug;

once shelved, forgotten.

http://www.metal-archives.com/release.php?id=20051

Hanzel und Gretyl - Scheissmessiah (2004: Metropolis)

Ministry + camp
+ Babelfish sums it up;

Es ist in Ordnung.

http://www.hanzelundgretyl.com/discography.php

Genitorturers - Blackheart Revolution (2009: Retribution)

Trades Machine Love for
Cramp-y Zombie bar band stand;
naughtiness remains.

http://www.genitorturers.com/home.html

http://www.myspace.com/genitorturers/music/albums/blackheart-revolution-14083032?songid=59126092

Black Sabbath - S/T (1970: Warner Brothers)

First steps finding way,
gem shines though its edges rough;

doom born to glory.

http://www.black-sabbath.com/discog/blacksabbath.html

Fantomas - The Director's Cut (2001: Ipecac)

Whacked-out novelty
of film tunes run Bungle-style;

spooks, snarks, and snickers.

http://www.ipecac.com/artists/fantomas

Demon - Night of the Demon (1981: Carrerre)

Brits take 70s

arena rock tropes to heart;

album art deceives.

http://the-demon.com/

Ballantinez - Charged (1985: Noise)

Shrieking subpar set
of ham-fisted wanna-rocks;

career one and done.

http://www.metal-archives.com/release.php?id=6532

Apocalypse - Faithless (1993: MMP)

Obscure Swiss thrashers
steam clean Overkill's gutter;

touch slower, still thumps.

http://www.metal-archives.com/release.php?id=5667

http://www.myspace.com/apocalypsethrashmetal

Aphrodite - S/T (1986: Alpha)

pre Drain gals dress up,
do their best Girlschool set;

flat as vocals are.

http://www.metal-archives.com/release.php?id=198300

Autumn's Grey Solace - Eifelian (2011: Projekt)

Airy ambience,
goth 'nuff to retain its cool;

Projekt scores again.

http://www.projekt.com/projekt/product.asp?sku=PRO00254

Concrete Blonde - Mojave (2004: Eleven Thirty)

Old fave shows her age,
her past bleak grandeur lingers

but those minutes few.

http://www.eleventhirtyrecords.com/artist_info.php?artistId=881&page=viewrelease&itemNum=CD-ELV-7001

Agalloch - Marrow of the Spirit (2010: Profound Lore)

Smart blast-to-beauty
blend adds to band's legacy

one of the best 'round.

http://www.myspace.com/agalloch

http://www.profoundlorerecords.com/index.php?option=com_ezcatalog&task=detail&id=681&Itemid=99999999

SatanaKozel - The Sun of the Dead (2010: Karjalan Bunkkeri)

Odds are mad Ruskies
spawn of Finntroll & 'Klaani;

not new/folky fun.

http://www.satanakozel.com/discography

Hiverna - I.Folklore (2010: self released)

Standard blackness adds
synths, "folk" bits as novelty;

reasonably fair(e).

http://www.myspace.com/hiverna